Please Have My Seat, I Insist!

Hey there!!!

Can I say that even though I’m not a fan of the rain that accompanies it, I’m really glad it’s finally becoming spring in Washington, DC?  It’s been a crazy winter and I’m amped that it’s about to be in my rear view mirror.  Trying my hardest to be as environmentally conscious as possible, I try to take the bus & train to work when it warms up outside.  Lemme stop lying – it’s currently the least expensive way to get to work.  Shit, I’d do it every day of the year, but I honestly hate the cold!  So when it’s below 60° F, if I’m not driving straight to work, the best the environment will get from me is parking at the metro and taking the train in.

So, today was my second day of the year hopping on the bus and train to head to work.  YAY me!  Not only because I’m an environmental superstar either, but because I get to people watch!  I’m honestly convinced that if you want to experience the true culture of a city, just get on some public transportation.

As much of an ass I can be, my mother drilled some values in me that I can’t seem to get away from, even when I try.  One of those is chivalry.  I know a lot of you ladies reading this are convinced that chivalry is dead, but it’s not!  When I’m on the metro though, I’m frequently reminded that it’s on life support.

Because I get on the train at almost the end of the line, I’m almost guaranteed a seat.  I also know that the chances of the train staying empty during rush hour is about the same odds of a chick never asking me “What are you thinking about?”  LOL…just saying!  So, I try to enjoy my seat as long as I can before the train becomes crowded.  If it doesn’t, that’s great because who doesn’t like to sit down on that plush padded vinyl that the metro provides for your sitting pleasure?  If it does though, no matter how tired I may be, I wait to see who’s left standing when everyone finishes boarding the train, and find the oldest “most mature” female passenger in my vicinity and offer her my seat.  I won’t lie though, every once in a while I fall asleep on the train and all of my chivalry goes out the window.  I do kinda feel bad when I wake up right before my stop and see the 95 year old pregnant lady with her 15 grocery bags staring at me in disgust…lol!

Anyway, getting back on track…It seriously bothers me to see a full train of men sitting and women (older, pregnant, with children, etc.) standing.  What makes it worse is when there are a few seats vacant and a dude rushes to sit down before the 10 women standing could sit.  Oh, and what takes the cake is when I get up and that same type of jackass takes the seat that I just got up from.

I officially forgot where I was going with this post (Oops?) so I’ll wrap it up by saying…

Fellas, stop the bitch assness! *Diddy Voice*  If the train is full, get up off your ass when you see a woman boarding.  Let’s prove to these chicks that just because your father may not have been present to teach you these things, there’s still hope for us.  I know, that was fcuked up, but let’s be real!  It’s often a common cause for these types of!


Ladies, you better take the god-damn seat if we offer it to you.  I don’t care if you don’t want the seat.  Sit your ass down!  I’m tired of some of you bitches beautiful women you telling me “no, it’s okay!”  It’s simple – if I get up to give you my seat, you sit down in that seat…because I said so!  You ole, ungrateful, miss independent ass, muh fcuka…lol!  Honestly though, it’s pretty awkward for me to get up and offer my seat in an attempt at being chivalrous to get rejected.  Just take the damn seat…Please & Thank You!!!

That is all…

About The Warped Reality

I'm a normal guy (in my and I enjoy my daily interactions with the weirdos out there!
This entry was posted in Etiquette A La Carte, On The Metro, Simply A Suggestion, Strong Enough For Her, But Written For Him, Venting. Bookmark the permalink.

2 Responses to Please Have My Seat, I Insist!

  1. Patrice Francis says:

    You’re funny. That’s alllllll so true!

  2. b. says:

    95 year old pregnant woman……smh you a fool.

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