I’m going to briefly step away from planning my annual birthday celebration, Eyes Wide Shut VII, and take a moment to vent a bit! Why? Because this blind bish pissed me off this morning. Yeah I said it!
Lemme start with the positive…
During my bus ride to the train station I was quite surprised when eight or nine dudes (including me) gave up their seats to women. I’m pretty sure the chollos of Langley Park the other dudes didn’t read “Please Have My Seat, I Insist!,” so I was truly amazed at the chivalry I saw on that bus and literally smiled at those random acts of kindness.
So I got to the Metro station, hopped on my train and took one of the few completely empty rows of seats. Four stops and fewer available seats later, the craziness began when this blind lady walks on the train.
Warning: this is going to sound a lil fcuk’d up! Lemme preface it by saying that I know less than nothing about blind protocol and that I’ve tried to re-write this as many times as I could to not come across as completely insensitive. (I swear this is the best I could do).
So this chick had to be one of the newest members of the blind nation because as soon as she boarded she ran straight into one of the poles standing passengers hold on to…And then repeated it with the very next pole. And in true female hitting-a-parked-car fashion, came this close to walking into someone sitting down! (Either I’ve been wrong in thinking that the cane they use is to warn them of shit in their path or homegirl needs to send that cheap defective shit back right now)!
At this point I didn’t know if to laugh or help out but I chose the latter because no matter what my exes might say I’m a nice guy. There was an available seat next to me with her name all over it, so I let her know. And in an attempt not to look like an uncaring asshole to look out for my fellow rider, I even tried to help her to the seat. Who told me to do that shit though?
I started guiding her to the seat and my girl pulled away like if I was one of those thirsty-ass nignags in the club grabbing at every chick who walks past. I almost responded with a “bish, I like girls who I can take to SEE movies,” but decided to behave. Then she instructed me to vocally guide her to the seat. That shit was the funniest, most classic shit ever – I swear it took a full 30 seconds and she still didn’t make a clean landing. Her butt became quite intimate with the arm rest before finally making contact with the actual seat!
She got settled and then says in this highly annoyed voice, “I know you were trying to help me, but I just don’t like random people grabbing me.” I responded with a simple “I understand” and kept it moving, but I was dying to ask if she preferred kissing poles forehead-first instead.
It’s hours later and I know I should just chalk it up to not knowing how to deal with the blind, but I still feel kinda slighted by her shitty-ass attitude when I was simply trying to help her ass out. Who said no good deed goes unpunished?